It’s very contradictory what I am about to post in addition to my other blogs. But I am going to share with you how I arrived to this blog today, I just got off the phone with a DF, dear friend, which whom I call my therapist. I was jazzing it up with her about my latest d.r.a.m.a. and newest happenings.  I talked to her about Him and after getting off the phone, I concluded that I’ll always love Him.  I will always love Him, there will always be a special place in my heart for him. But what the greatest conclusion is, is that when we broke up and I couldn’t see the light. I called on God. I know, I know I should thank God for my ups and my downs, I’m still working on that piece.  And it is ironic that I am sitting in the dark with on the light from this LCD screen to help me type. But when my friends were sleep, with their boos, living their lives, the lime light was gone, I’d sober up, no more bass from the speakers, nor strobe lights, bodies jivin to the rhythm, last calls, or staggered walks to the car and convos about who’s the most sober one to drive and where to get the 4th meal. I was alone and reminded of the truth.

In a dark room, it was just me and God.  Those nights I cried, God heard me. 

Often, I’d pray to him to help and he finally answered.  One day a light bulb went off in my head, immediately after hanging out with Him, I knew I had been delivered.  I’d never thought I see the day that I would turn to reckless actions to solve my problems, it’s not me, it never was me.  I’m back in the same boat, only it is not a relationship that has gotten me down, it’s life’s own triles & tribulations.

I must have faith. God will forsake me. Through him all things are possible.